Submission Sunday 2.25.24: The Rejection Interview with Tamara MC

Our latest rejection interview: "The Writing Angel shall decide."

Happy Sunday, writers! Thank you for subscribing.

Herein I continue my quest to interview successful people about their experiences with rejection. I’m grateful to writers Cecil Castellucci, Kate Maruyama, and Camden Noir for agreeing to participate in The Rejection Interview series, and next up we have Tamara MC. I originally met Tamara in a class we took with Sari Botton about editing and selling an anthology. I was delighted when she answered a recent call I posted here for willing writers.

Dr. Tamara MC is a cult, child marriage, and human trafficking Lived Experience Expert who advocates for girls and women to live free from gender-based violence worldwide. Her Ph.D. is in Applied Linguistics, and she researches how language manipulates vulnerable populations. Tamara attended Columbia University for an MFA and has been honored with residencies/fellowships in Bread Loaf, Iowa Writers' Workshop, Sewanee, Ragdale, Cave Canem, VONA, and VCCA. She's published in prestigious outlets such as The New York Times, New York Magazine, Newsweek, Salon, The Independent, Food 52, Parents, and Thrillist. She’s revising her debut memoir, Child Bride: My Marriage at 12. 

I can’t wait for Tamara’s memoir to be published so I can learn more about her compelling story. Let’s get this interview started…

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SS: Thanks so much for agreeing to this interview, Tamara! Would you say that you fear rejection? Why or why not?

TMC: I’ve never been terribly afraid of rejection. Anything that didn’t come into my life wasn’t meant to. Life would be overwhelming if everything was a yes, if everything I wanted or wished for came my way. Yes, you can have 20 pink Barbie limos. Yes, you can take home every stray you’ve ever seen in your whole life. Yes, you can sleep and cuddle with hundreds of cows in your twin-sized bed. Now that would be overwhelm! Thank goodness, I never got a yes to my high school crush, who I recently saw on Facebook. He’s not nearly as cute as I remember.  

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SS: What does literary rejection mean to you?

TMC: Literary rejection means one of two things. My piece is not right for this publication/publisher/editor… at this moment in time. Or two, my work isn’t up to par yet. I still have more to do on the craft of writing or in telling this particular story.

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SS: What’s a rejection that you mourned at the time but now are grateful for?

TMC: I sent out a query for my memoir, Child Bride: Married in a Sufi Cult, to my dream agent in 2016. I was in shock when he responded within minutes. We went back and forth, but in the end, he didn’t sign me. I was devastated at the time, but fast forward seven years—I’m thrilled. Since querying him, I’ve graduated from two separate yearlong memoir programs, Grub Street’s “Memoir Incubator” and Story Studio Chicago’s “Memoir in a Year.” I’ve also taken countless classes, rewrote my memoir 1,220,345 times, and have built an amazing literary community.

I am a helluva stronger writer now. I wasn’t ready in 2016. Nor was my story hatched in 2016. I needed to study structure and storytelling more. I needed more therapy. More time and distance, despite my story having taken place over 25 years prior. There really are no timelines in the game of writing. There is an old Yiddish adage, which translates to, “We plan, and God laughs.” Living the writing life is an unpredictable road. But we signed up for it because we’re still here kicking. There is nothing else I’d rather do. I don’t have a Plan B, so it’s go big or go home.

A lot of the process of publishing writing is about giving up control. This doesn’t mean we don’t work our a$$es off, but rather, we grind while also leaving space for mayhem and mystery.

The “Writing Angel” decides when a story is ready. No sooner. Make friends with her.